Knowing how to tell a guy you like him isn’t always easy. Sooner or later, every one of us will fall for somebody. It’s one of the most exhilarating feelings in life. The giddiness when you see them walk through the door, the nervousness in your stomach when you catch their eye, the teenage euphoria when they so much as smile at you.
Yes, falling for someone really is incredible. But, if you want to meet single men and have it blossom into more than a passing infatuation, you need to learn how to tell your crush you like them. To help get you started, we’ve broken it down into bite-size chunks below, to keep things from feeling too daunting – because it doesn’t have to be!
First Things First: Do You Actually Like Him?
Before learning how to show a guy you like him, it’s important to look inward and try to gauge the depth of your feelings. Are you genuinely falling for him, or is this only a brief infatuation? A telltale sign it’s a passing infatuation rather than love is that, when it comes down to it, you don’t really know that much about them.
If you don’t know much more than their name and the fact they look great in a pair of jeans, you’re probably not quite as smitten as you think you are. Instead, you’re likely projecting all the attributes you’d like to see in him, regardless of what’s actually there – so bearing your soul to him probably isn’t a fantastic idea.
If you’ve gotten to know him reasonably well already, however, it’s safe to assume your feelings are based upon a more solid foundation that’s likely to last. This means it’s worth telling him how you feel! Now for the next step…
Should You Tell Him You Like Him?
Let’s rephrase that question: Is he single?
If he’s in a committed relationship and hasn’t said anything about being polyamorous or breaking up, then the answer is no – you shouldn’t tell him you like him. If he’s in a healthy, good relationship, be happy for him and leave it at that. That said, if he decides to leave his partner because he’s too smitten with you, that’s his choice to make.
If he’s single, there are one or two more things to consider before telling him you like him. Firstly, are you already friends? If so, there’s more on the line, as the fallout (positive or negative) from declaring your feelings may alter your friendship.
If you’re already friends, therefore, it’s worth reading up on a few classic signs he’s interested in you before telling him how you feel. This way, you can be more confident that he’ll reciprocate your feelings when you reveal how you feel.
When to Tell a Guy You Like Him
Picking your moment is almost as important as finding the right words. A short list of places you probably shouldn’t confess your heart’s true feelings:
- Across the room in an office meeting
- In a bar after two bottles of wine
- While he’s exchanging wedding vows with his fiancé
In all seriousness though, when you’re ready to tell him how you feel, try to catch him somewhere quiet in a space where you have time to talk properly. If you’re already comfortable with each other, suggest meeting up somewhere and taking a walk or going for a drink. Ideally, you’ll both be sober, and not surrounded by friends or distracted by your environment.
And now, the subheading you’ve been waiting for…
How to Tell a Guy You Like Him: 5 Top Tips to Bear in Mind
So, how do you tell a guy you like him? To help you out with a bit of guidance, we’ve laid out some key points to bear in mind below.
1. Lay the groundwork
If you want to learn how to tell your crush you like them, the first thing to realize is that you don’t have to go from 0 to 100. Instead, put the groundwork in early. A little flirting — over text and in person — and a few compliments every so often should help to give him at least a vague idea that you’re interested.
If you do this over time, it’ll mean that when you finally drop the “I like you” news, it won’t be a complete surprise. After all, people react to surprises in unpredictable ways. And, even if he likes you back, blindsiding him with an unforeseen deluge of affection might make him feel too nervous to reciprocate. So take your time and build up the tension.
2. Plan what you want to say
You don’t need to plan, of course, and some people will prefer to go off the cuff. If you’re nervous though, thinking of what you want to say beforehand can help keep you on track and stop you from rambling or appearing all flustered and bewildered.
3. Find your courage
Telling somebody you like them is scary. There’s no getting around that. You can, however, embrace it. A little nervousness is all part of romance! When you’ve found your moment, take a deep breath and go for it.
4. Be confident
Confidence is sexy. When you’ve said what you wanted to say, don’t panic or begin to backtrack while you’re waiting for their response. Before diving into the big moment, practice a bit of positive self-talk. This will help you to feel more confident in yourself before revealing that you’re into him.
Even if you don’t get the reaction you want, they’ll be far more impressed with you if you remain playful yet understanding, as opposed to becoming timid and apologetic.
5. Don’t forget to smile
When you’re in the middle of telling a guy you like him, it’s easy to stiffen up under the nervous tension of the moment. But, try to stay as relaxed as possible and keep smiling throughout. Genuine smiles are one of our body’s ways of showing the person opposite that we want to be closer to them. It’s a great way to communicate your desires without having to find any words!
6. Have an idea of what you want to happen next
Okay, so you’ve told him you like him, and he’s said he likes you back. If you haven’t thought beyond this, that’s understandable, but it’s useful to have an idea of what you’d like to happen longer-term.
Depending on your circumstances, you might want to suggest a chilled, easy first date. Or, if it’s already past that point for the pair of you, you might decide it’s the right time to suggest entering a relationship together. It’s a hugely exciting moment, so enjoy every second of it!
The Bottom Line
Nobody said that figuring out how to tell a guy you like him wasn’t going to be daunting. But it can also be electrifying and empowering. So, next time you’re wondering how to tell your crush you like them, remember to follow these six points:
- Lay the groundwork
- Plan what to say
- Find your courage
- Be confident
- Don’t forget to smile
- Have an idea of what you want to happen next
Learning what to say to a guy you like will help you take control of your dating life in the future, and help you to find the love you deserve. So get it!